I am very proud of my very modern family. However, trying to explain to people the complexity of how we all came together can be daunting. Throw in a few marriages, children, bonus children, grand babies and ex spouses and there are branches flying everywhere.
The new theory is that we need a pamphlet to just hand out.
Sitting at the nail salon with 2 of my step daughters (neither biologically mine nor biologically related to the other) one of my bonus kids was asked whom she was with. “That is my step mom and this is my stepsister, we are here for my dad’s birthday”
Bonus daughter #2 “he is my step dad, and this is my step mom”
*insert quizzical look*
Bonus daughter #1 “its complicated”
Those are the moments where I am proud. Those are the moments that I want to tell them how proud I am.
My glorious, messy family would not exist if every member did not stand up for it. There would not be a messy diagram if each of them did not rally thru hurt, anger, stress and frustration. Each of them in their own way have chosen to be apart of something crazy and amazing and hard to explain.
I realized for the first time that our family only exists because we all love each other. Good, bad and indifferent we are in it to win it. It was never just me creating something and working towards something, I have never been alone in this.
In a perfect world, divorce wouldn’t happen and till death do us part would happen for everybody. There are days when I wonder how on earth I have divorce in my history, but then I realize that there are amazing people in my life that I would not have otherwise. My life would be less without them in it.
I tried to diagram it out, and even I started to get a little dizzy…but a thankful dizzy.
We DO need a pamphlet ya’ll.